Translator: Alpha0210
What exact moment does birth refer to?
Is it the moment one first escapes from the mother’s womb? Must one only describe the instant of breaking from an egg as being born? Then what about life forms that are not born in such a way?
For instance, if a machine were considered a life form, what would be the exact moment of its birth?
When all necessary parts have been assembled…
When all information has been input…
Or the moment artificial intelligence is installed…
Bubble…
It was a quiet place where the sound of water droplets could be heard.
While I was alone there, at some moment, I became aware of the existence called ‘me’.
It was perplexing.
That was because I already knew far too many things before even becoming self-aware. That is, enough to realize that my current state was not ordinary.
To realize something is not ordinary, one must, of course, be well aware of what is ‘ordinary’… yet I had no such experiences. I had never left this small space─though I didn’t even know if it was small or large.
Because right now, I hadn’t even been born.
This, too, was strange.
How did I know that I had not yet been born?
This space could be the entirety of the world.
Bubble…
The sound of a water droplet was heard once again.
…My eyelids were becoming heavy.
This sound… was familiar and comforting.
It seemed like it was something I had been hearing all along, even before I became self-aware.
…Warm.
A pleasant drowsiness softly wrapped around my whole body.
I could no longer endure it and closed my eyes.
Of course, since I couldn’t see anything, that expression may not be accurate.
***
─Become strong.
─Become stronger than anyone.
─Strong enough to fight alone.
When I regained consciousness, I heard a voice from somewhere.
It was a terribly stiff and emotionless voice, and once again I couldn’t help but feel bewildered. Not only did I hear the voice, but something like information also came crashing into my head.
‘Ugh…!’
I nearly screamed. In fact, I may have already screamed.
Due to the terrible pain, as if my skull was cracking open, it was hard to calm my consciousness.
Moreover, the pain only grew stronger.
It hurt so, so much.
‘Stop, stop it…’
I desperately wished for this phenomenon to cease, but the pain did not subside. It felt like countless small explosions were going off inside my head… Each explosion sparked, and in one spark, there were at least hundreds of thousands of pieces of information.
Only then did I realize the cause of this terrible pain.
It was due to the overwhelming amount of information being supplied to the point of burning out my brain.
─Become strong.
─Become stronger than anyone.
─Strong enough to fight alone.
─Please…
Once again, the voice was heard.
My cheek felt warm. I was probably crying a stream of tears.
To reduce the pain even slightly, I decided to organize and categorize the pouring information…
The forms of information were all different.
It was sometimes simple knowledge, sometimes someone’s experience, and other times someone’s imagination.
However, it was of one kind.
That’s because they were all related to the ways of becoming strong.
‘…The one injecting this information into me must want me to become strong.’
Even within the pain, I faintly realized this, but to be honest, I didn’t want to.
That’s because I had no particular desire to become strong.
Though it wasn’t certain, I felt that fighting someone didn’t suit my disposition.
But even while I was thinking such thoughts, the voice continued without end.
─Become strong, become stronger, become strong.
─Alone, by yourself.
─Please, I beg you.
‘……’
For some reason, I couldn’t ignore this voice.
The voice didn’t carry any forcefulness.
It’s just that, the voice that at first seemed stiff became increasingly desperate.
There was a feeling of desperation, like someone with nowhere left to hold on, endlessly falling and finally grabbing onto a single branch.
I simply couldn’t disregard that voice.
‘Should I become strong?’
I asked myself.
‘…I have to become strong.’
I answered myself.
At some point, I was thinking that in my head.
At the time, I didn’t realize it, but that was my first goal.
***
I don’t know how long I’ve been here.
In this place, the flow of time was unclear. It may have been a space designed that way from the beginning.
Perhaps… it was a place that existed ‘outside’ the normal temporal flow.
During that time, I accepted and digested an immense amount of information.
And, as the ‘voice’ occasionally requested, I made constant efforts to become strong.
I didn’t know how strong I had become, but even when I imagined facing the beings stored in my memory, I didn’t think I would lose.
That… was a bit frightening.
I kept thinking about whether it was truly right for someone like me to possess such power.
But there was no way to refuse, so I spent my time reinterpreting the information I had received, recombining it anew.
And around the time when receiving information no longer brought any pain,
I saw light.
‘……!’
Right after, vivid sensations surged through my entire body.
“Huh-up!”
Until now, it had been as if I were a person severed above the neck, able to think and feel, but unable to move, but now that restriction had completely vanished.
Even in that moment, I felt fear more than a sense of liberation.
“Cough, cough……”
I spat out some sticky liquid and felt the texture of the ground.
It’s hard…
The air was chilly, and a constant ringing filled my ears. Inside my body, it felt as though lava was boiling… Something seemed to be clinging to me. Was it my hair?
Though I was confused by the suddenness of it all, I soon realized that everything I was feeling was still within the ‘normal range.’
I was merely experiencing confusion from the abrupt activation of previously controlled senses.
‘Your Highness.’
Then, a voice was heard.
Though the tone was different, I realized it was the same ‘stiff voice’ I had heard all along.
‘Your Highness.’
‘Ah, finally.’
‘At last……’
Your Highness, were they referring to me?
I knew the meaning, but I didn’t understand it.
Why was I their king?
It was a desperate voice. It seemed to be filled with emotion.
One after another, voices trembled violently as they spoke.
Only then did I open my eyes slightly and look around.
Numerous beings of various forms surrounded me, and even just their gazes carried a terrifying pressure.
I found them frightening not because of their appearance, but for another reason.
Yet strangely, I couldn’t look away, and as I continued to stare blankly, they slowly began to lower their heads. As if that wasn’t enough, they even bowed down completely.
I was still afraid of them, but something else caught my attention even more.
“…Why.”
As my lips moved, a voice flowed out.
Before I could even feel the emotion of speaking for the first time in my life, I continued speaking dryly.
“…Why, are, you, trem, bling.”
What came before fear was doubt.
Because everyone surrounding me was trembling so pitifully.
I continued.
“…Are, you, afraid, of, me?”
Those surrounding me answered.
No.
“Then, why?”
Once again, they responded.
We are.
All of us.
Are afraid of the enemy who will soon descend upon us, Your Highness.
So terrifying that we cannot endure it.
I fell silent for a moment, then asked again.
“Who is that enemy?”
…Then, while still bowing, those gathered spoke in unison.
***
The enemy called ‘Destruction’ was an unknown entity.
Even those who had implanted such vast knowledge into me knew almost nothing about them.
I gulped.
All those trembling right now were powerful. Every one of them was among the most formidable in the world, far removed from the concept of fear.
Yet now, like baby birds caught in a rainstorm, their bodies were quivering.
They say fear is contagious.
With such powerful beings all overcome by terror, fear surged up within me as well.
However, I couldn’t show any of those emotions at all. It was because of the way they were looking at me.
In their eyes shimmered joy and expectation.
‘Destruction is an enemy that will erase our world without a trace, Your Highness.’
‘It is a being that seems like a fusion of the unknown and fear, and it is so powerful that we have no means to fight it.’
‘That is why Your Highness was born.’
“……”
‘Please.’
‘Your Highness, please defeat them.’
‘Please save us.’
‘We beg of you.’
And so, I came to know the reason I was born.
I see.
I was born to save these people, to defeat the enemy called Destruction. There was indeed a clear reason why I possessed such great power.
But even though everything had become clear, even though most of the questions surrounding me had been resolved.
I felt even more suffocated. It was as if fog filled my mind, and strangely, my chest grew so heavy that even breathing became difficult.
My lips moved.
“I… am…”
All eyes turned to me.
“…I am…”
My words caught in my throat.
There was something I needed to say, but I couldn’t bring myself to say it.
The combined weight of the gathered gazes felt as though it was blocking the words from escaping.
‘Your Highness.’
And I already knew the answer they wanted.
‘Your Highness.’
Their overlapping voices spilled out.
Voices I couldn’t produce, they were voicing so easily.
They were laying bare their true feelings.
So they were being honest, while I could not be.
Sometimes, isn’t that alone enough?
A reason to be more respected, I mean.
“I will fight.”
The moment I declared this in a low voice, the atmosphere grew heated.
“I will defeat your enemy.”
A joy they couldn’t hide slowly began to spill out from them.
“Every single one of them, without exception.”
But that demeanor,
“Therefore, follow me.”
Flicked out like a candle.
Just like that, it suddenly went cold.
I was caught off guard again by the chilling silence.
And then, I realized they were now looking at me with entirely different eyes than before.
In their gazes, the joy and expectation from earlier had been replaced with something more ominous.
‘Your Highness.’
‘Forgive us, but…’
The one at the front spoke.
‘We will not fight.’
‘We have no intention of fighting.’
What?
‘You will fight alone, Your Highness.’
‘Please, with dignity, defeat Destruction by yourself.’
By myself?
‘Yes, Your Highness.’
Why must I?
Confused, I looked at them.
I could tell. These people were not weak. Just as I had analyzed before, each one of them possessed considerable power.
‘We would be of no help.’
And yet, they were saying this.
‘And we are certain that even alone, Your Highness will be able to stand against it.’
They were all saying it in unison.
‘Because we are the ones who created you, Your Highness.’
“……”
‘Your Highness… are you afraid?’
And then came the disappointed gazes.
I didn’t know why, but that was harder to bear than anything else.
I barely held myself back from stepping backward, but I couldn’t control my gaze. Before I knew it, I looked slightly behind me.
There was a massive capsule.
Inside it, sticky fluid remained, along with traces of something having poured out with it.
Just a moment ago, I had been inside that. That was my world.
And now, my world had expanded a bit.
The world that had grown was not warm at all, but cold.
A place surrounded by metal. Where cold air scraped along the skin. Everything was new, yet oddly lonely.
But some things hadn’t changed.
There, and here, I was alone.
An existence that had to be alone.
“……”
Those who knelt.
Those who now cast chilly gazes.
Those who call me Your Highness.
My vassals.
I closed my eyes.
Only at that moment did I fully understand their intentions.
“I see.”
And the words they wanted to hear.
“…Then I will fight alone.”
A world that had grown slightly larger.
Because that world as a whole wished for it,
I decided to do so.
***
I truly did understand myself well.
Fighting did not suit me at all.
Even if the opponent was one who destroyed and erased worlds. Even if left alone, it would bring nothing but harm.
The act of hurting something, of cutting off its breath, was not enjoyable in the slightest.
The beings called Destruction were strong, but even more than that, they were persistent and cunning. Killing them one by one, making sure each one truly died, exhausted me deeply.
Each time, I felt guilty.
This is not right.
Feeling fatigue over something like this is not what I was made for.
I was not created to be this weak.
I can do better.
More… a little more…
‘Your Highness, are you alright?’
I am fine.
‘Are you in pain?’
I am not in pain.
‘Can you continue fighting?’
I can continue fighting.
‘Are you afraid?’
I am not afraid.
I was made that way.
…
…
…
Which means, I am probably a defective product.
Because in truth, I was not alright at all.
Every moment hurt, and I could never get used to fighting.
Whether I was fighting or not, I always trembled in fear.
‘Help me.’
To endure, I created one method for myself.
At least inwardly, I allowed myself to scream what I wanted to say.
‘Help me.’
But… was this really a scream?
What I once called a scream eventually turned into a wail.
I wished that no one would hear this pathetic wail, yet at the same time, I wished at least one person would hear it.
It was a terrible contradiction.
‘Please help me.’
The more I tried not to show anything, the louder the scream inside my heart became.
But since nothing changed, at some point only laughter came out.
Before, and even now.
I felt as though I was still trapped inside that capsule.
No matter how much I screamed, my voice would reach no one.
Even though others were in the same space, in truth, I lived in a world of my own.
It had been that way, and I believed it would continue to be so in the future.
…
That is what I thought.
*****
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